5 Signs You’re Not a Bad Mom, Even If You Feel Like One

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5 Signs You’re Not a Bad Mom

Do you ever lay awake at night feeling like you’re just not doing enough as a mom? Do you constantly second-guess yourself and worry the kids deserve better? If so, you’re not alone. Many moms struggle with confidence and feel like bad moms at times.

But here’s the truth: lack of confidence doesn’t mean you’re a bad mom at all. There are so many signs that you’re absolutely killing this parenting thing, even when you’re too hard on yourself to see it. As a dad who sees all the behind-the-scenes work moms do, I’m here to reassure you with 5 foolproof signs you’re not a bad mom, despite those pesky feelings.

1. You Worry About Being a Good Mom

The fact that you even care this much about being a great mom means you already are one. Bad moms don’t waste time wondering if they’re good enough; they’re too checked out for that. But you? You’re so invested in being the best parent possible that you analyze every detail.

While all that worry might keep you up at night, it comes from a beautiful place: wanting the absolute best for your kids. You don’t just love them, you like them as people. You want to nurture every aspect of their growth and development. That level of care and concern makes you an incredible mom.

Plus, all that overthinking shows you’re willing to work hard to improve as a parent. Being open to learning new approaches through parenting books like the What to Expect the First Year means you’re on the path to being your best self. Your kids are so lucky to have a mom who cares this much. So next time you feel like a bad mom, remember it’s just not true.

what to expect the first year parenting book

2. You Make Sacrifices For Your Kids

Moms devote their entire lives to their kids in ways dads will never fully comprehend. You carry babies for 9+ months, give birth, breastfeed. As they grow, you shuffle their schedules, cram in activities, constantly put their needs above your own. Those daily sacrifices show just how deep a mom’s love goes.

Making your kids the priority – even when it means giving up sleep, hobbies, and me time – is a clear sign you’re a caring, nurturing mother. Providing the best care and opportunities you can, like enrolling them in educational classes and buying stimulating toys like Melissa & Doug Wooden Building Blocks, proves how dedicated you are to their wellbeing.

Doing so much for others can be draining. But the fact that you power through shows how strong you are. You’re able to tap into an endless supply of love and patience most moms didn’t know they had pre-kids. That makes you pretty superhuman if you ask me. So, you can let go of that bad mom inner critic.

3. You Try to Improve as a Parent

Part of worrying about being a good mom means you’re constantly trying to step up your game. You read all the books, scour blogs for tips, ask other moms for advice. Maybe you’ve even taken parenting classes to expand your knowledge.

Whatever you’re doing to gain skills, it shows you care about improving. You know parenting is an ever-evolving journey, not a static skillset. This growth mindset is essential to raising kids in our rapidly changing world.

The effort you put into getting better – whether it’s learning positive discipline techniques from How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen or taking an online class – means so much. It shows you’re committed to becoming the best version of yourself as a parent. Your kids are lucky to have a lifelong learner for a mom.

So, the next time you feel overwhelmed and like a bad mom, remember all the work you’re putting in. You’ve got this.

4. Your Kids Feel Loved

One of the biggest signs you’re an amazing mom is happy, affectionate kids. Despite how drained or inadequate you may feel, if your kids are thriving emotionally that means you’re providing something very right.

Children who feel safe, accepted, and valued are more likely to become happy, confident adults. The fact that your kids seek you out for comfort when they’re hurt or scared shows you make them feel secure. And the way they spontaneously say, “I love you,” give hugs, and want to be close shows they feel that love reciprocated.

So, although you may not feel like you’re excelling as their mom, their satisfaction and affection are clear clues that you totally are. Keep trusting those kid snuggles and smiles over the lies your inner critic tells. Those bad mom thoughts simply aren’t accurate.

5. Other Moms Share Your Struggles

Here’s a little secret: behind closed doors, even celebrity moms and parenting “experts” struggle sometimes. Motherhood is incredibly difficult, and every mom experiences self-doubt. No one fully knows what they’re doing!

So, the fact that other moms relate to your struggles – whether online or in real life parenting groups – is proof you’re not alone. We all have rough days where the kids fight endlessly and simple tasks feel impossible. It’s normal to sometimes feel like you’re failing them.

But the truth is, by showing up each day, loving them fiercely, and trying your best, you’re absolutely not failing. Modern parenting is a tough gig without enough social support. So go easy on yourself next time those “bad mom” thoughts creep in. You’re in good company.

I Told You, You’re Not a Bad Mom!

If you’ve ever stayed up at night feeling inadequate, I get it. I see how hard my wife works every day to be a great mom. But feelings of insufficiency rarely match reality.

Hopefully these signs helped reassure that despite those tricky emotions, you’re doing an amazing job. Your kids are so lucky to have you as their mom.

Whenever you’re feeling like a bad mom, come back to this list. Let it ground you in the truth that you care deeply, try your best, and are absolutely killing this parenting thing – even on the days you can’t see it. Give yourself credit for working so hard at the toughest job there is. You’ve got this!

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Hey there! I'm Allen, but you can call me "The Corny Dad" from Canada. I have a wife and four kiddos. Yep, one's full grown, but they'll always be my babies. When I'm not doing something with my family or playing video games, I'm here, jotting down my bits of wisdom on this blog. From the fun stuff to the parenting chaos, I cover it all. Believe me, with the right attitude, parenting's a smoother ride and I'm here to help.

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