Take the “Am I a Bully?” Quiz

I’m the Corny Dad and I don’t have any magical abilities. But through my secret wizard friends, I’ve learned that my words and actions still have power. Like a spell, they can uplift or harm others. I want this blog to help fellow muggles reflect on our behavior. Have we ever bullied someone without realizing it? Today, we’re going to find out.

Bullying means repeatedly hurting, harassing, intimidating or excluding others intentionally. It isn’t always physical – gossip, rumors and shunning also count. My wizard pals showed me that while I don’t have magic, I still have power over others through my words and deeds. Let’s use our powers for good, not evil.

To further explore the power of our words and actions, consider reading “The Survival Guide for Kids with Behavior Challenges: How to Make Good Choices and Stay Out of Trouble“. It’s available on Amazon and is highly recommended.

Do You Use Words to Cut Down Friends?

Think honestly about how you treat friends. Have you insulted or teased them in cruel ways? Broken promises and shared secrets for laughs? Spread lies or rumors to the group? When I was younger, I did all of this.

In 4th grade, my friend Hannah confessed she liked a boy in our class. I promised secrecy, but I immediately told my other friends to get a reaction. Soon the whole class knew and Hannah felt humiliated. At the time, I thought spreading gossip was fun drama. Now I realize it deeply hurt someone I cared about.

It’s easy to justify being mean and claim you’re “just kidding.” But words have power and consequences, even without magic behind them. Next time you want to gossip or put down a friend, pause. Are you wielding your words to wound them? Channel your powers into compassion instead.

Do You Ignore Outsiders at School?

Now consider students outside your friend group. Do you exclude them through ignoring, judgment or avoidance? This was a blindspot for me too.

When Angela transferred to my school last fall, my friends and I took one look at her clothes and hobbies and decided she wasn’t worth getting to know. For weeks we pretended she was invisible. Finally, one of my friends intervened, telling me she was bullied this same way at her old school. Ostracizing someone hurts just as much as direct teasing.

I started making an effort to include Angela. While we’re still not best friends, I've learned she’s actually pretty cool. Judging someone before you know them says more about your character than theirs. Don’t let cliques stop you from showing kindness.

Have You Used Strength or Power Against Others?

This question requires self-reflection. Have you ever leveraged strength, status or popularity to control or humiliate others? My tall friends love lording their height over shorter kids on the basketball court. But it goes too far sometimes.

When I was younger, my buddy Mike swatted away a short boy’s basketball shot and taunted him nastily. Another of my friends, who struggled with bullies of his own, pointed out that Mike’s behavior echoed his tormentors’. No one wants to feel small and powerless. Mike apologized, realizing he had abused his power thoughtlessly.

We all have unique strengths, whether physical, social or otherwise. The true test is how we use them. Never wield your powers to make others feel inferior. Treat everyone as your equal, regardless of appearances. Don’t become the villain of someone’s story.

What To Do If You Were the Bully

After reading this blog, you may realize times you intentionally or unintentionally hurt others. Admitting our mistakes is tough but necessary for growth. If you know you bullied someone, here are next steps:

• Sincerely apologize to anyone you harmed with your behavior, without excuses. Own your actions.
• Going forward, catch yourself before gossiping, teasing, excluding or controlling others. Stop the harmful impulse immediately.
• Make an effort to include and learn about those outside your social circles. Spread kindness through actions big and small.
• Speak up when you witness bullying. Defend victims and become a strong force for positivity.

My wizard mentors taught me that redemption is possible through courage and compassion. It’s never too late to change your ways. Redirect your powers from harm to good.

Conclusion to "Am I a Bully?"

I don’t have magic spells, but my words and actions still impact others. We all desire connection and dignity. Foster this by wielding your power for good. Consider your choices - will you uplift others or inflict harm? The decision is yours. Let kindness and empathy guide you, not ego. Be the light.

If you're questioning your actions and wondering, 'Am I a Bully?' take the first step towards positive change by visiting STOMP Out Bullying at https://www.stompoutbullying.org/are-you-a-bully for resources and guidance.

Uncover the deeper reasons behind hurtful behavior and reflect on the critical question, 'Am I a Bully?' by exploring insights and personal stories at The Corny Dad's page on understanding bullying: https://thecornydad.com/why-we-need-to-understand-bullying/.

Shop for Books on Bullying by Clicking Here

Hey there! I'm Allen, but you can call me "The Corny Dad" from Canada. I have a wife and four kiddos. Yep, one's full grown, but they'll always be my babies. When I'm not doing something with my family or playing video games, I'm here, jotting down my bits of wisdom on this blog. From the fun stuff to the parenting chaos, I cover it all. Believe me, with the right attitude, parenting's a smoother ride and I'm here to help.